Bazillions of Dollars and Geithner's Pants on Fire: Mr Geithner Goes to Washington, Still Sucks

Oh Timmy, Timmy, Timmy... really? Really? You had weeks to prepare for your grilling by the Senate Banking Committee and this is the best you could come up with? This is disappointing even for you and frankly I'm ashamed. I really hope Mrs. Geithner cuts you off for a few weeks to teach you a lesson (if she hasn't already for your many, many other bumbling missteps). You, sir, are a tool. I really can't come up with a better description.

Geithner's full testimony may be found here. I'll save you trouble of reading it and reiterate what I have been telling you all along: This guy is full of shit. Worse, he's more full of shit than the rest of the crew (Bernanke, Volcker, Summers, and the rest of the Economic Demolition Team come to mind) amd the worst kind of liar in that he just doesn't give a flying rat's ass whether or not you believe him. In fact, perhaps he wants you to question him for entertainment's sake. Not like it matters to Geithner and his keepers, they're going to do whatever they want whether or not you buy their song and dance. And you, dear reader, can do little but sit back and hope the bad guys grease your ass a bit before they fully bend America over.

We're a little ways away from a full financial assrape at this point, but the looting is getting to be a bit much. Guns and butter? More like lube and blindfolds.

Ready for the acronyms? Here's Geithner's take on where TARP has gone and will go once they figure out who needs more funny money.

Projected Use of TARP/Financial Stability Plan Funds by Administration as of May 18, 2009

Programs Announced Under Previous Administration
AIG $40 billion
Citi/Bank of America (TIP and Guarantees) $52.5 billion
Autos $24.9 billion
Capital Purchase Program $218 billion
TALF 1.0 $20 billion
Subtotal $355.4 billion

Programs Announced Under Obama Administration
Housing $50 billion
AIG (Second Investment) $30 billion
Auto Suppliers $5 billion
Additional Autos $10.9 billion
Expansion of Consumer and Business Lending Initiative
TALF Asset Expansion (New Issuance) $35 billion
Unlocking SBA Lending Markets $15 billion
Public Private Investment Program
TALF for Legacy Securities $25 billion
Other PPIP Programs for Legacy Assets $75 billion
Subtotal $245.9 billion
Total Committed (Without Potential Repayments) $601.3 billion
Total Remaining (Without Potential Repayments) $98.7 billion
Conservative Estimate of Potential Repayments $25 billion
Total Committed (Including Potential Repayments) $576.3 billion
Total Remaining (Including Potential Repayments) $123.7 billion
Additional Funding
Additional Support for the Auto Industry
Capital Assistance Program

I find this to be the funniest part: "Conservative Estimate of Potential Repayments $25 billion" Is this because no matter how hard Jamie Dimon tries, Geithner refuses to take back the TARP? WTF is going on? Seriously, I need someone to explain it to me because I feel like I just dropped a shitload of LSD just looking at this.

Whompwhompwhomp, look out, there go the tracers!

For an interesting take on Geithner's grand grilling, I recommend the play-by-play via WaPo's The Ticker. A peek:

Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner, who just finished testifying before Sen. Chris Dodd's (D-Conn.) Senate Banking committee, said that "it's not fair" that AIG counter-parties are getting paid 100 cents on the dollar by government bailout money but "if I felt there was a better way...I would support it."

Geithner was responding to tart questioning by Sen. Mark Warner (D-Va.) asking why, when others owed money by the troubled insurance giant are taking "haircuts," the counter-parties (such as Goldman Sachs) are getting all the money owed to them.

"It is an incredibly difficult balance and it is very hard to know if we're going to get the balance right," Geithner said. AIG has received or been promised more than $150 billion in bailout money.

Geither got his anger up at one point, saying that, "I would not give a penny to AIG to protect counter-parties" if he didn't have pay them to reduce the risk to pensions and other taxpayer-related funds that have done business with AIG and that are owed money by the company.

LOLZ. What an asshat. I've got a suggestion for the Financial Stability Plan: fire this dickhead before he makes things any worse. Please. Like now.

Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.


notsoingenue said...

Our sexy little beast could not resist stepping into the idiot pool now could he? What and let Joey and Pelosicchio have all of the fumbling to themselves? The little hope float up the river without a paddle. Better than reality survivor style television sadly enough.

cl5v5r said...

ouch. didn't think *that* was what they meant by "priming the pump"

Line up, cl5v5r, you're in line for a dicking too you know ;)



Our poor sexy beast. what a fucking mess he is eh? There are times when I sort of feel bad for him... but then I realize that he's a diabolical bastard and suddenly don't feel so bad.

And hey, at least his brother still thinks he's sexy...