Ben Bernanke's Second Term: The (Pre-)Aftermath

Sometimes, this really does remind me of a bad zombie movie.

So I guess I'm supposed to talk about how this entire thing makes me feel. The overwhelming sentiment I heard this evening was one of relief that zombie Greenspan wasn't summoned from beyond the grave to take back the Fed. Though one must wonder what sort of world we live in where we settle for the least bad option every time.

Larry Summers? No fucking thank you.

Janet Yellen? You had to be kidding me.

Ben Bernanke? Why not?

I may regret saying this later on but this may be the first time I don't feel disappointed by Chairman Maobama. I suppose like a bad Wall St analyst I simply shot low and was then amazed by the results. I didn't expect much, nor did I expect Obama would extend Bernanke a second term. Perhaps he is due some credit. God, this is going to bite me in the ass later, isn't it?

We don't need a cowboy as Fed chair. We don't need a Tim Geithner and we certainly don't need zombie Greenspan. Bernanke is moronic at worst and diabolical at best and maybe that's exactly what we need right now. We don't want a mini Greenspan. Bernanke is docile enough not to be a threat as long as he keeps Geithner away from his agendas (he still has cooties).

Come on now:

Mr. Greenspan refused to answer a question about how far the Fed would push up interest rates in order to defend the dollar’s value, responding simply, “I pass.” Indeed, the Fed chief indicated a general reluctance to speak forthrightly about monetary policy. “Since I’ve become a central banker,” he said jokingly, “I’ve learned to mumble with great incoherence. If I seem unduly clear to you, you must have misunderstood what I said.”

Or how about this AG winner:

I know of no Federal Reserve policy actions which are affected by the Treasury Department. We do not solicit their views on policy questions. We obviously try to coordinate with them in the sense that we are part of the United States government. We should not have conflicting policies with the Treasury if we can avoid it, and, as best I can judge, we seem to be at the moment looking at the work at large in a similar manner, and I hope we can continue to do so… but the presumption that the Treasury controls monetary policy is false.

You know you've thought it more than once,
come on now

I have never heard Ben Bernanke speak like that. He stumbles in front of Congress. He matches his tie to Timmy and wears brown socks with black shoes. Come on, look at the infamous Wikipedia shot! The guy isn't capable of singlehandedly destroying the economy. He may, however, be the guy who has to dispose of its remains.

Who better than the rocket scientist of economics to dissect the corpse? Larry Summers? Please, he's gross. His agenda was far too obvious to be effective; Bernanke, as a politically-castrated Republican (or so he claims), is a perfect fit right now. Suspicious? Gentle Ben? Yeah right.

I'd stay out of the market when OMG Obama makes his official announcement unless you're into cumshots, it's going to be an all out porno shoot in response to this news.

I will not be participating. FYI.

Shouldn't this 2008 Time magazine Bernanke jerk off have been tagged "artists and entertainers" instead?

Bah. I'm not impressed. This is the best we could do right now and that's not saying much.

Since Bernanke and I not only share a sign but a birthday, let's see what the stars had for us today (8/24 will end up being a bank holiday next year in his honor):

You are often upfront with your feelings, yet you don't necessarily dwell on them. You normally prefer to let your actions speak for you. Now, however, you might believe that you have something to hide. Luckily, keeping your emotions to yourself is easy today with the Moon in your 12th House. Remember, there's a lot to discuss about all the developments at your place of work, which can take the focus off of your inner process.

LOLZ. I can see how he'd be distracted by work. Hang in there, Zimbabwe Ben. I've said it before, if you want to effectively dismantle the Fed, you need to leave them alone. Insanity? Try strategy. ZB has four more years to fuck things up further.

Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.


Erica Smith said...

I want to make 1 guest post in your site, if you permit me. The post contains 350 words above and it is totally unique as it is written by my content writers.

Please contact me at ericasmith568(at) soon. Moreover, I will place your link in one of my finance sites.

Erica Smith

that's fascinating. I'm glad to see all of that Indian infrastructure we funded went to good use, "Erica"

Bill said...

Ben was the obvious choice - keep system going . What CEO is fired in the middle of a crisis? well... some are. Curious what the markets reaction to this will be ?