BlackRock to Buy Colonial Bank



...at least that's the impression we get from the FDIC's panicked and all-too-entertaining Googling this morning. Sheila, did you dispatch the FDIC interns to do a little research to see if news of the deal that no one knows about has been leaked? If that is the case, I believe you just fronted yourself off. Remind the kids to use a proxy server next time they're searching for mentions of backdoor deals that you're trying to seal in time for Bank Fail Friday, mmmkay?

We here at Jr Deputy Accountant have been absolutely thrilled to see the interest in the Colonial BancGroup mess and frankly we couldn't be happier to see our friends at the FDIC frantically Googling the situation so they can keep tabs on the happenings. Or non-happenings. Or happenings on happenings that haven't happened yet that they're hoping won't get out which they pretty much busted themselves out on by checking for.

Oh yes, we saw what you did there and ohhhh boy do we have some stories to share. Listen, I know BlackRock is into buying toxic assets and all but WTF? If any interested parties would care to see what else the above concerned agencies have been up to in the last, oh, 12 hours or so, please don't hesistate to contact me.

So here's a toast to you, FDIC, drink up!


(h/t WC Varones for the inspiration and LOLZ. Lots and lots of LOLZ)

Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh...I have a friend who works at colonial, but I don't think they have any idea how serious the situation is. Do you think they'll get taken over today?

Anon,

Actually they were sold off to BB&T last night. Expect the FDIC to sell off the bad parts that BB&T doesn't want to touch.

Send your friend my regards. When this happened with JPM/WaMu, 12000 employees were laid off. But BB&T is exponentially better than those JPM rats.