Wall Street Mafia: Yeah Basically We Didn't Learn a Thing, Watch This!

Monday, September 07, 2009 , , , 4 Comments


we're on the lookout for the next one we swear!
check out our sweet anti-inflation helmet!
w00t*

*View Master reels for Geithner not included


Remember when Bernanke did that bit on Lessons Learned? Told you it was a sham.

NYT:

The bankers plan to buy “life settlements,” life insurance policies that ill and elderly people sell for cash — $400,000 for a $1 million policy, say, depending on the life expectancy of the insured person. Then they plan to “securitize” these policies, in Wall Street jargon, by packaging hundreds or thousands together into bonds. They will then resell those bonds to investors, like big pension funds, who will receive the payouts when people with the insurance die.

The earlier the policyholder dies, the bigger the return — though if people live longer than expected, investors could get poor returns or even lose money.

Either way, Wall Street would profit by pocketing sizable fees for creating the bonds, reselling them and subsequently trading them. But some who have studied life settlements warn that insurers might have to raise premiums in the short term if they end up having to pay out more death claims than they had anticipated.

"The bankers," GOD NYT you make it sound so pornographic and scandalous. Oh wait...

Goes to show you that the Wall Street Mafia are happy to securitize everything that isn't nailed down. Paper chases are so much fun to watch.

Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.

4 comments:

Junior:
I read this article and conclude you missed the point. If the Wall Street Mafia's profits will improve the sooner the insureds die, will the Wall Street Mafia contract with "La Cosa Nostra" to speed the insureds deaths? For a piece of the action of course.

"Pop"

Pop,

the thought crossed my mind but then I said... NO FUCKING WAY, they can't be THAT evil, can they?!

thanks for the confirmation. they can.

jr

W.C. Varones said...

Grab the ammo.

I'm going to buy this shit and start killin'!

WCV,

WIN!!!