The Fed's Real Life Zombie Movie

Thursday, October 22, 2009 , , , , 0 Comments

h/t WC Varones, how empty my life would be if I hadn't seen this.

How fucking hilarious is this? Crossroads Mall sounded awfully familiar when I read the name over at Mish's. Why? Because I've seen Dawn of the Dead 15 bazillion times. This shit has turned into a bad zombie flick, are we ready to riot yet or what? Don't be Andy scrawling "Bail me out, Bernanke" in blood on a whiteboard.

Anyway. Mish:

Those wondering exactly what kind of garbage may be the Fed's balance sheet would be interested in reading Deserted shopping mall bleak symbol of Fed bailout.

A $29 billion trail from the Federal Reserve's bailout of Wall Street investment bank Bear Stearns ends in a partially deserted shopping center on a bleak spot on the south side of Oklahoma City.

The Fed now owns the Crossroads Mall, a sprawling shopping complex at the junction of Interstate highways 244 and 35, complete with an oil well pumping crude in the car park -- except the Fed does not own the mineral rights.

Bwhahahaha the Fed needs the right to drill.

Does the Fed also have the accompanying zombies on its balance sheet and if so, do those count as assets or liabilities? What about store inventory? How much counts as spoilage if a zombie baby is born on it?

Forget Michael Moore, we need George Romero on this. Bailout of the Dead. Maybe the Fed will let them borrow Crossroads Mall to shoot the film and Bernanke can make a cameo.

Fucking ridiculous. Is this legal??

Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.