Jr Deputy Accountant Needs Your Help. Srsly.
I rarely ask for shit out of you people though I enjoy the rubs and the thanks and the love (seriously, it gets me off) and that will never change but I need a favor from all of you.
Are you outraged yet?
Are you ready to take back your country or are you going to sit there and allow the criminal Wall Street Mafia to financially assrape your children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren with Zimbabwe Ben at the printing press happily cranking away your future and theirs just so Lord Blankfein can push a Bentley?
Wake the fuck up, people.
Email me (to right) and grow a pair already. We're taking it back. NOW.
I promise I don't bite. So this is for you, asshat at Credit Suisse who refreshes JDA all day (do they treat you well over there? You sure?). And you, PwC in Florida. And yes, even you, weirdo in Oregon who landed here Googling some awfully strange shit which I won't get into here but ended up sticking around for whatever reason.
I need every fellow financial blogger who links to me or LOLs at my inappropriateness or digs my BERNANKE 00% t-shirt to email me. You guys are going to have to step up or I'll be forced to call you out as attention whores without the cojones to back up your claims.
Operators are standing by. Well, actually, Jr Deputy Accountant will be standing by her inbox ready with the manifesto. The time for excuses is over and this isn't kindergarten. I don't know about all of you but I have a 6 year old boy who shares my last name and he is counting on me to get this right. I don't even care what your motivation is, I'm just trying to disclaim my own.
Grow a pair, bitches, the time for revolution is now.
You know what to do. Don't cry to me later when you've got an RFID chip shoved up your ass and are in a white jumpsuit doing mandatory jumping jacks in front of the Obamatron with "GS" branded on your backside.