It's a Miracle! The Bailout Will Save Us All!

Whew! Crisis averted!
Wait a second...

That must be an awesome central banker power. Just mention a bailout and suddenly everything is under control. Fuck! I want that power.

But I know my first thought after wielding it just once would be "oh shit, now I actually have to bail them out." Maybe that's just me.

Hey! Dubai is totally under control, fuck yeah, that was easy and convenient since it all happened over the holiday here in the US. If you are playing in the sandbox today, seeing as how it's our first full day back after this event which is supposed to cause a few ripples or two, I might recommend good protective eye wear and possibly a nut guard.


Asia stocks and currencies rose as the United Arab Emirates pledged support for its banks, easing concerns that losses from Dubai World will spread. Treasuries and the cost of protecting corporate debt fell.

The MSCI Asia Pacific Index climbed 3.5 percent to 117.84 as of 4:30 p.m. in Tokyo, the biggest gain since April 2. South Korea’s won strengthened the most in a month. Commonwealth Bank of Australia advanced after the country’s four biggest lenders said they don’t expect “material” losses from the possible default by Dubai World, an investment company burdened by $59 billion of liabilities. European futures fell.

Standard & Poor’s 500 Index futures added 0.6 percent and those on the Dow Jones Euro STOXX 50 index gained 0.2 percent after the Central Bank of the U.A.E. said it “stands behind” the country’s lenders, allowing them to borrow money for half a percentage point above the three-month local benchmark interest rate. Equities also gained after China’s government said it will maintain stimulus policies, lifting the MSCI World Index 0.8 percent from a three-week low.

“There is relief that things are not as serious as they might be,” said Matt Riordan, who helps manage about $5.1 billion at Paradice Investment Management in Sydney. “The risk of a serious contagion affecting the global financial system doesn’t now seem likely or probable.”

Dubai’s stock index fell 7.2 percent, the most in a year, while Abu Dhabi’s measure slumped 8.1 percent as the United Arab Emirates’s markets began trading for the first time after Dubai World announced plans to delay debt repayments. Emaar Properties PJSC, the U.A.E.’s biggest developer dropped 9.9 percent.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, forget about the bailout, how come Citigroup auditors (that's you, KPMG) didn't go "dude, what's up with all this money going to Dubai? Are these guys good for it?" way before this little hiccup?

Anyway, it's entirely strategic. Emerging Voice hits the nail on the head calling Abu Dhabi "the emirate of last resort" bwhahahaha. Throw some money around, get some payback. Nothing to see here...

Red flag, bitches, Google it.

Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.