Market Fundamentals for Total Idiots. + Bill Gross and Loller Dollar

If they taught basic market principles in preschool, the 3 year olds would understand that the "exceptional" performance of the stock market in recent months is directly connected to the poor performance of the dollar.

Speaking of preschool geniuses, PIMCO's Mohamed El-Erian says stocks cannot continue this jerk off. No shit, does he also know that the Fed cannot indefinitely print money? This guy is brilliant, no wonder PIMCO is doing so well (erm, we'll get to that later):

Homes are selling at their fastest clip in nearly three years, the unemployment rate is falling and stocks are up 66 percent since their March lows - the best performance since the 1930s.

What's not to like?

Plenty, according to Mohamed El-Erian, chief executive of giant bond manager Pimco. The investor says the recovery may be gaining steam but is no different than a kid who eats too much candy at one of the birthday parties his 6-year-old daughter attends.

"We're on a sugar high," El-Erian says. "It feels good for a while but is unsustainable."

His point: This burst of economic activity fed by government spending and near-zero interest rates will soon peter out.

Do you think? I really hate to get filthy again but it's like a 17 hour porno movie, at some point the Fed's fucking monetary firehose has got to run out of ammo. No? Keeps fucking going. Sick bastards. I don't hate it, WaPo started it by saying "peter out"... anyway, you get the point.

Speaking of PIMCO, WC Varones channels yours truly and warns us rubbing Bill Gross would be totally inappropriate at a critical time for capitalism such as this:

[B]efore we get all warm and fuzzy about Bill Gross, look at his next comment:
“It’s capitalism, I guess, but it’s not to be applauded.”

Exsqueeze me? What the f&^@ do central planners manipulating interest rates for the benefit of the politically connected wealthy have to do with capitalism?!?

Bill Gross is an asshat.

Fuck yeah, WCV.

(The answer, of course, is not a thing but we can get to that bit later when you're ready)

Yeah so the dollar is still shit and the gold rush continues. I laugh at "the gold bull" and "the gold bubble", you show me a stable dollar and then maybe you will bear witness to a real gold bubble, otherwise this is just nature taking back the ecosystem.

Didn't you guys read Nuri in 8th grade? Come on, keep up, we did market fundamentals in 1st grade.

I'm available if Mr El-Erian needs a primer.

For my American readers, if you aren't getting your news from outside of this fucked up distorted wonderland we call home, I implore you to hop on the bandwagon. It's a sad day for America when Al-Jazeera delivers the most realistic picture of the day's news but that's just where we are right now. Don't get stuck on WSJ and NYT and the rest of the usual suspects.

As my Shanghai roommate once told me, at least in China they tell us they're going to edit our news. Here they do it to us and we don't even care.


Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.