TLP: Time to Start Planning the Next Grand Old Party Party

Saturday, February 27, 2010 , , , 4 Comments


Obama has a year under his belt. The challengers are lining up on the Republican side, elbowing each other a little bit now, but definitely scoping each other out for the bitch-slapping to come. So it makes sense that GOP leaders are doing some scoping out of their own and looking for a city to overwhelm for a few drunken days and pick a nominee.

The Republican National Committee has weeded out convention applicants and come up with three finalists. Hookers of Phoenix, Tampa and Salt Lake City – OK, maybe we'll need some girls who like to travel for work – it's time to brush up on your kinky. You can guess how Republicans like to get down and summer 2012 will be here before you know it.

From the CNN Political Ticker:

"These cities submitted three very strong bids, so all three are in contention," Holly Hughes, an RNC member from Michigan who chairs the RNC Site Selection Committee, told CNN. "Hosting a convention is a huge deal. A city has to raise multiple millions of dollars, but they also get the benefit of showcasing their city and bringing in revenue."

A 12-member RNC Site Selection Committee will visit the cities in late March and early April to meet with local officials and evaluate the potential sites - and will then make their final recommendation to the RNC. The full 168-member committee will vote to select the host city at the RNC's summer meeting in July.

"Phoenix, Tampa, and Salt Lake City are all amazing American cities and I wish them the best of luck with their bids," RNC chairman Michael Steele said in a statement.

Sounds so exciting and an opportunity for civic pride, showing off the best a city has to offer and all of that bullshit. The Lazy Paperboy covered politics once he finally shed his delivery bag and grabbed a reporter's notebook. So he can tell you first-hand that conventions, at their heart, are massive whorefests. And that's not even counting the girls staking out the hotel bars.

From the candidates and their hangers-on, to the delegates so fucking delighted to have a chance to cut loose out of town, to the corporate sponsors giving away truckloads of swag and the biggest sluts of all, the look-at-me-me-me media ... it's a non-stop circle jerk wrapped in red, white and blue.

The Lazy Paperboy

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.

4 comments:

W.C. Varones said...

Phoenix in the summer. What could go wrong?

They should just save themselves the trouble and plan to have the convention at C Street.

beebsblog said...

I spent two summers in Phoenix working construction. It was brutal.

Of course, the ladies and gentlemen will be in air conditioning. But oh my when you go outside.

Excellent point, WCV and beebs. And Salt Lake City has its own issues, maybe more temperament than temperature. So, Tampa?

As for your idea, JDA, don't think those clever bastards aren't looking at that business model already.