Dominique Strauss-Kahn's Sweet Severance Package (Insert Lorena Bobbitt Joke Here)



h/t The Daily Bail

Care to guess who pays the most into the International Monetary Fund? Why the American taxpayer, obviously, duh!

And here's some great news on our ROI for that particular scam... looks like (alleged) humiliated pervert and third world nation sodomizer Dominique Strauss-Kahn will receive quite the severance package from the IMF now that he's resigned in shame. Infinite sadness? More like gold toilet seats and Bentleys. It's hard out there for a debt pimp, you know.

Here are the terms of his gig, courtesy of the IMF. If it's TL;DR, that's $420,930 a year plus a $75,350 bonus to cover "a scale of living appropriate to your position as Managing Director" which does not include the additional "entertainment" expense allowed on top of that. By our estimation, that's about $500,000 or 41,666 hours worked by the maid he (allegedly) assaulted. Assuming she works 40 hours a week every week at $12/hr, it would only take her 20 years to make what good old DSK made in a year. Not bad, old man, not bad.

Your salary as Managing Director of the Fund shall be $420,930 per annum. As explained in Section 14(b) of the By-Laws, this salary shall be net of income taxes.

b) You will receive an allowance in the aggregate amount of $75,350 per annum, similarly net of any income taxes, payable in equal monthly installments, without any certification or justification by you, to enable you to maintain, in the interests of the Fund, a scale of living appropriate to your position as Managing Director and to the Fund's need for representation. In addition, you will be reimbursed for reasonable expenses actually incurred for entertainment directly related to the business of the Fund.


c) The Fund will reimburse you per diem at the rate applicable to Executive Directors plus reasonable vouchered expenses not covered by the per diem, including all hotel expenses, incurred by you for travel in the interest of the Fund. Such expenses shall include travel and hotel expenses of your spouse in attending Annual Meetings of the Board of Governors held outside the Washington, D.C. area, and in accompanying you on official travel in circumstances where this is in the interest of the Fund.


d) Both your salary and your general representational allowance will be adjusted on July 1 of each year beginning in 2008 by the percentage increase in the Washington metropolitan-area Consumer Price Index1 for the twelve months ending the preceding May.

Sweet! But wait, there's more!

(i) You will participate in the Staff Retirement Plan, with effect from the date of your appointment.

(ii) In addition to the pension which you will receive under the Staff Retirement Plan, you will receive, as from the commencement of this pension and continuing for the duration of your life, an annual supplemental retirement allowance equal in the amount to a percentage of the total pension payments you receive each year on account of your participation in the Staff Retirement Plan, determined according to years of completed service as indicated in the table in Annex I; provided, however, that the amount of that supplemental retirement allowance each year would be reduced to the extent that you receive income from regular and continuous employment of not less than six months' duration.

(iv) This supplemental retirement allowance will be payable in equal monthly installments along with the monthly payments from the Staff Retirement Plan. Should you elect either to receive a withdrawal benefit or to commute a portion of your pension under the Staff Retirement Plan, an amount equal to the percentage applicable to the number of years of completed service set forth in the table in Annex I, of the amount paid in commutation would be paid to you at the same time under the supplemental retirement allowance scheme. In addition, any other elections or options selected by you that apply to benefits under the Staff Retirement Plan will likewise apply to the corresponding benefits applicable under the supplemental retirement allowance. All payments will be subject to any necessary adjustments, including recovery for overpayments, at the end of each year.

At the end of your term or terms of service, or if your service is terminated by the Executive Board after more than one year of service, or if you resign after having served for at least two years, you will be paid a Separation Allowance equal to a percent of the total salary paid to you during your last year of service, according to years of completed service, as indicated in the table in Annex I. The amount of the Separation Allowance will be reduced by the amount of any non-taxable income, and by two-thirds of any taxable income, you receive from regular and continuous employment of not less than six months' duration, as explained in footnote 2, during the year following the end of your service. In addition, the Separation Allowance will be reduced by the amount, if any, of the supplemental retirement allowance paid for the period covering the first year following your separation from service. All payments will be subject to any necessary adjustment including recovery for overpayments, at the end of the first year. The Separation Allowance would be net of income tax in the same manner as your salary.

We consulted Annex I, of course, and found that DSK will receive 60% of his salary as a Separation Allowance. So that's $252,000, on top of the retirement plan.

Financially raping the third world and literally raping hotel maids is apparently a sweet gig, it's obvious I've missed my calling.

CNBC has (updated) details on DSK's golden shower, er, parachute.

Jr Deputy Accountant

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard.

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